A key who opens many locks is a Master Key…

March 4, 2012 § 1 Comment

Don Sabo describes in his essay the focus of sex in younger men. He gives us a good look into the thoughts and culture of a male discovering the meaning of sex and intimacy while growing up. I have to agree that what Sabo describes in his essay fits what I’ve noticed around young males while growing up, even as a girl. One thing’s for sure,  boys like these don’t even try to hide their degrading words and actions around women, expecting us to agree with them. And the fact is, some women agree — they make themselves into objects, sexual beings for said males to get their attention, to get everyone’s attention. In fact, I think it’s almost a requirement to be sexual if you expect to be popular today. Just look at Hollywood.

I think Don Sabo is right. The reason why boys and men act this way about sex and women is because of their need to be independent. To be a man, you have to be independent amongst other things, to rely on someone is to be weak and powerless, that’s the philosophy most boys are brought up upon. Although his experiences almost all involve ‘jocks’, the way I see it today, all kinds of guys are doing the same, this problem is not limited to mere athletes.

In his essay, Don Sabo tells us that more men are becoming open to intimacy and relationships nowadays, but I suspect this is not all true. I believe what Don Sabo is experiencing is nothing but growing up and socializing with more mature groups of people. As men mature, they just lose the excitement of making crude sexist jokes and establishing their masculinity amongst their group of friends. At that point, they want something more. But the habit is passed onto the next generation and we see a multitude of younger men doing the same as their older counterparts. Sabo is right, there is really nothing we can do to stop this vicious cycle until we achieve until we get complete equality between genders. But then again, how can we ever achieve equality when such information is passed down from generation to generation with no sight of an end?

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§ One Response to A key who opens many locks is a Master Key…

  • Tiffin says:

    Great points, but we also need to look at factors other than what men learn from their family and peers. Even if they have good role models to look up to about healthy relationships, instead of hiding their feelings and only caring about sex, men are constantly shown images of these kinds of men. A great example in our society is the sitcom, “Two and a Half Men”. Charlie Sheen’s character, who is seemingly looked up to by many men, is like the male athletes Don Sabo describes. He does not want intimacy and only looks to have sex with women, not a commitment. This type of man is idolized by society as being a “true man”. So the problem Sabo describes reaches beyond the locker-room.

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