The Myth of the Sexual Athlete

February 28, 2012 § Leave a comment

Don Sabo’s article “The Myth of the Sexual Athlete” talks about how men interact together about sexual feelings, how aspects of a  sport are portrayed as sex, and what he thinks men really want. When talking about his locker room experiences as an athlete, he describes his younger years as being heavily influenced by his team members. They would look at Playboy’s and talk about boobs in the locker room. I think this goes on because if a boy were to say that he didn’t want to be disrespectful and look at a girl in that way, he would probably be teased just as the boys he mentioned were. They may say he is a virgin, implying that there is something wrong with that. This makes boys think that they would be more accepted or thought more highly of if they had sex with all the girls they could.

The topic of men’s sports is brought up because they are thought of as not just a male but as a sexual athlete, and one that is agile, attractive, and able to please a woman. Men often see women as a sport. Scoring without  being emotionally attached to the woman is their ultimate goal . The male is viewed as more masculine than if  had strong feelings for her without having sex. This partially comes from men feeling the need to be comfortable with being alone, not afraid of losing someone. This gap keeps men from having a deep understanding relationship with women.

Then there is the needs and wants of a man. Part of them wants love and intimacy and part of them fantasize about sexual desires without having commitment. This is a tug-o-war between a man’s heart and his mind. Their wants do not match up with what they need. At some point, they will realize that the social construction they have experienced about their masculinity does not match the way they really feel.

My favorite paragraph was the very last one when he says he is opening up to women’s opinions, learning things about himself, and reconstructing his sexuality. He makes a lasting statement that relates to everyone, “I have stopped pretending that i enjoy being alone. I never did like feeling alone.” When you pretend to be someone you’re not and try to be what society wants you to be, you will feel alone and lost. You have to find out who you are and embrace it.

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