Response #3- Dilemmas Of Involved Fatherhood

January 25, 2012 § 2 Comments

Dilemmas Of Involved Fatherhood

 

   In her article “Dilemmas Of Involved Fatherhood” Kathleen Gerson brings up the interesting double standard of parenting. There are several issues that men must face if they want to become involved fathers; career sacrifices, income, public policy and social perception. All of these concerns for males are often shadowed by the argument involving women, parenting and the workplace.

   Kathleen reminds us that the first issue men deal with is career sacrificing. Most part-time jobs are not lucrative to success. Finding a part-time job that offers great pay and benefits is equally difficult. It can be especially frustrating for fathers that have already devoted and invested themselves into a specific career path.

   Social perceptions of men also put them into a straining and limited position. American society declares that fathers must be resource providers and career driven. If a man decides to put his career on hold to be a father, how is that beneficial for the family? Who will bring in the income necessary to provide financial stability? Men that decide to stay home are also seen as “feminine” and weak with not enough public-policy to support them. Employers do not provide great support or take paternity leave seriously.

   I would like to address the class and ask a few questions involving the topic of men and parenting. In my own family, my father worked while my mother stayed at home and handled domestic duties. What was the dynamic in your own family? Do you feel that men wanting to father are not given enough support? Do you feel that it is an issue comparable to women, mothering and the workplace?

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§ 2 Responses to Response #3- Dilemmas Of Involved Fatherhood

  • katielee87 says:

    In my family, both of my parents worked full time and had their own successful careers. However, at the end of the day, when my father came home to relax or work out or do something else along those lines, it was my mother who worked the “second shift” and cooked dinner, did the laundry, etc. I never really noticed or appreciated this difference until after I was older and my parents had divorced. Now, my mother spends a lot more time doing things for herself and she is a lot more happy because of it. I think my family’s dynamic stems from the idea in the essay that says “… the social value of public pursuits outstrips the power and prestige of private ones …”

  • My father worked full-time while my mother stayed at home and took care of any domestic duties. I am one of five children which meant quite a bit of work for her. All of us were expected to help with chores such as laundry, cleaning, etc. I never really thought about this dynamic, although I did wonder if my mom was happy.
    While her work was appreciated, we could have always done more to express this. I owe my mom quite a bit for sacrificing her own wants to take care of us.

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